Youtube Is Creating The New Idols

October 28, 2014

Youtubers are defining the day to day lives of ordinary teenage boys and girls in the same way that the Spice Girls dominated and dictated the intelligent thoughts of millions of school children in the 1990s. We have reached a point as to where males and females, famous for only speaking of themselves and their hapless yet intriguing lives, are hosting their own events, winning awards on a national and international scale and buying multi bedroomed houses with their earnings. Queen sung all those years ago; "is this the real life, is this just fantasy" and now I have the phrase echoing through my brain on repeat as I can't seem to fathom the thought that the internet has created careers like no other and has helped to not only indoctrinate young people but teach others that life can be difficult and hard and without these famous Youtubers I seem to believe that some of our children would not be alive today. The Youtube generation are the new idols.
My name is Olivia and I am a seventeen year old girl from the North of England. I was brought up to believe in one of the most difficult recessions to hit the country in nearly thirty years. I do not have a clear memory of when computers did not dominate every second of daily life nor do I remember the days when phones weren't held in the palm of every businessman or director. I have friends who weren't born when the first Rollercoaster Tycoon game was released and I'm too young myself to even envisage Take That on their first assault on the charts.
The current teenage generation have only known internet access at every minute and the youngest of this generation will not remember when there weren't over 70 television channels free to view for twenty four hours every day. We have had access to websites since we were born, and my life can be categorised by the social networks I was using at the time. Piczo, MSN, Yahoo Messenger, Bebo.. all names which have faded into oblivion but have had a profound effect on millions across the world.
Famous faces such as Zoe Sugg and Tanya Burr have been there to watch through years of countless troubles, niggles and nightmares and because of that, have become idols. The amount of money they are earning is proof of the illustrious industry they are made from. Eleven year olds now glance at their subscription boxes and see a new hairstyle tutorial from a twenty something and have a warm feeling inside. Just like the generation before us screamed with delight when they saw the Spice Girls strutting their stuff on Top of the Pops, our generation die with happiness every time their notification bar lights up green. They see Zoella and wish to be like her. They look at her and think 'superstar' and hope to one day have a beauty range in Superdrug too. They see a girl who started out with nothing just like them, reviewing cheap make up in hope of fulfilling her dream.
Even if the child wants to be a vet or a chemist or a teacher, they see hope and inspiration in the echoed words of the Youtuber. They see 'just say yes' and follow this mantra like it was written in the Bible. They faint and refuse to relax every time their idol calls their name on a Live Stream or during a tweet marathon and hold the hallowed words dear to their hearts, or as their mobile phone background or Twitter bio. They are living through a recession and see happiness and determination radiating off the Youtuber and pick this happiness up like it was an infection. 
A reader of The Telegraph emailed this message to the newspaper and it helped me to understand why teenagers and the young ones of this generation feel the need to idolise successful, real people who have broken through the glass ceiling of contempt and are enjoying a life doing what they love.
"Sir, I am getting increasingly annoyed at the barrage of articles about teenagers, and the adults who keep trying to explain our behaviour. We are not as irrational and immature as adults seem to think. We've grown up with financial crises and accept that most of us will be unemployed.
We no longer flinch at bloody images of war because we've grown up seeing the chaos in the Middle East and elsewhere. Most of us are cynical and pessimistic because of the environment we've grown up in - which should be explanation enough for our apparent insolence and disrespect, without "experts" having to write articles about it.
We need to realise the love and admiration the young have developed for Youtubers as they are now the key to unlocking the futures of the coming generation, just like the boy bands and girl bands were in the late 1990s.
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I Feel Comfortable

October 26, 2014

 Striped Tee: Topshop | Jeans: (or when at sixth form, jean style trousers) H+M
Socks: Topshop | Brogues: Urban Outfitters | Coat: Miss Selfridge |
Earrings and Choker: Moncou Handmade
My style is defined by the mood I find myself in, which doesn't necessarily mean that the day this outfit graced my hips my emotions expressed the connotations linked to black. It was the opposite actually, I felt as if the world was ready to be captured by the slight and short fingernails I have grown accustomed to owning, and that nothing and more importantly, nobody could force me to change.
Wearing this outfit is more pivotal to my overall existence that I let myself realise.
A black jacket from Miss Selfridge revealing a rather bog-standard continuum of monochrome is a staple in the 90's infused wardrobe of any teenager now and although this fact is one that every hipster will deny, what I am wearing is sincerely ordinary. Ridiculously ordinary and 'boring' if I asked Gok Wan for his opinion, I'm sure he would say.
Alas, I feel an overwhelming sense of happiness and achievement every time I wear this outfit. By pulling a basic tee shirt over my head I allow my brain to relax and tell myself that everything will be okay. By pulling up a pair of black jeans, somehow I hear flashbacks in the back of my eardrums reminding me of the days where I was too scared and mortified at the shape of myself to even fathom trying a pair on.
I inwardly cringe at frequent memories where I refused to wear the things I am wearing now but it shouldn't be a surprise that wearing a figure hugging outfit is a daunting experience for those of us who are not gifted with a body fit for a queen. Alas, we have had it regimented into us that certain items of clothing are not suitable for certain people. Apparently I shouldn't wear jeans and this thought echoed through my body for years of my existence.
All I am trying to say is that wearing something isn't as easy as just throwing it on. Wearing bog standard outfits is not easy. Wearing a pair of brogues while owning a pair of stumpy legs is not easy. Wearing jeans which not only hug every lump and bump of an unforgiving frame but make some people sick with worry over how they are appearing to others is not only unhealthy but it is upsetting too, and I feel as if lots of people don't know but also don't understand how it feels to be somebody who hates their appearance so much that it takes a lot to even throw on something basic.
My conscience says that learning to appreciate that everybody has inner battles everyday is crucial if we are to move forward as a generation and I hope, I sincerely hope that we learn it fast instead of coming to assumptions, yet I also believe that this generation that I find myself belonging to is fast at encapsulating and agreeing to points that make lives better and for that, I am proud to say that I am a teenage girl from the United Kingdom who can agree to change and believe in my own and others' lives.
-- ramble over --
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Yearning To Write #Project365

October 18, 2014

Never let anybody tell you what to do. Nobody.
The time I spend lavishly writing my thoughts and displaced dreams on this blog is my own time, it is nobody else's and for that reason alone I should be allowed to partake in this adventurous life inspiring moment and write my hopes and what I want on Olivia Curls. Nobody can ever take this away from me and I will make sure of that every single day until blogging and passion fizzle out like an unexpected chemical induced bang.
A week spent away was spent writing essays, downing shots and smiling (or grimacing) in a need to be productive and I'd love to say that these past seven days have been fabulous. My days were fun filled while containing various embarrassing anecdotes which will certainly come back round to haunt me over coffee and cupcakes in five years time. But something was missing.
I was yearning to write again and keep writing until my fingertips struggled to a halt through sheer exhaustion and scenarios echoing this thought whirred through my mind until I picked up the laptop this afternoon after a day with the family to let it all out.
I find writing therapeutic and sweet and satisfying, and though the idiots may natter and cut holes through every inch of happiness I've carved up through it, nothing is going to stop me. And with this, I'm going to put my spin on #Project365 and allow my bubbling sense of anticipation for everyday out.
For the next three hundred and sixty five days, in fifty two carefully articulated posts there will be a fifty word story accompanying a picture which signifies the day. Diary writing has never interested me as my lack of perseverance and constant need for perfection irritated me too much while writing a from the heart diary so this somewhat written prose is my alternative. 
 Hope you enjoy it.
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This fortnight I #2

October 12, 2014

Look at me, reaching number two in a series, is this a miracle or am I dreaming? As always, this fortnight has been a bit of a whirlwind where I've consumed copious amounts of Coca Cola, (diet of course) eaten three pizzas and finally accepted that to move forward in life there is a stampede of thoughts that need to be put to bed and I feel as though I am now on my way to achieving something. Fashion wise, my looks have been slightly boring and comfortable as the new dress code in college is suffocating my attempt to look half awake and half decent but hopefully it'll pick up and the teachers will forget about it next month, it seems to be that my school spend more time gravitating towards hating you rather than teaching but the inner optimist tells me that this could be for my own good. Alas, I'm going to see The Ordinary Boys next month which I'm rather excited for so expect to see some happiness infused tweets over the coming weeks as I prepare for my first mosh pit experience.

Read: I've mentioned before that my brain is not allowing me to hold concentration enough to read a whole book, yet there are many articles I've read and become engrossed in the past fortnight, like this Nadine Coyle article for the Daily Mail (though I hate to say it, she is my gal) - hearing somebody you've admired and looked up to over eleven tiresome years speak about their hopes and dreams being crushed as if they were crumbling through a mechanical rubbish bin is something I hoped to never hear, yet I somewhat understand where Cheryl and co are coming from. (sad faces all around)  

Watched: This fortnight has taught me to never go on Youtube when there is something pressing that needs to be completed. Lily's Youtube videos have provided me with hours of laughter while teaching me to believe in myself and trust my own struggles, though these fantastic hours have prevented me from finishing coursework and exam prep - yet which would I rather be doing, working or understanding what I'm working for?  

Listened to: The Ordinary Boys' albums have provided a constant soundtrack to a quiet, sweat infested library as the drums and guitar beats ram through my soul and into my heart, and for that I'm grateful. I also discovered that Cheryl Cole's track 'Happy Hour' was also recorded by the superstar which is Rihanna; hearing two dramatically different voices overlapping and complimenting each other while still holding their own is something that I didn't expect to hear from the duo and it made my mind smile a little on a rain dampened Monday morning.

Discovered: I discovered a video early last week named 'Shit Beauty Bloggers / Gurus Say' which was narrated by Zoe London, the rather beautiful yet eccentric blue haired babe from London which opened my mind to the hilarity of the blogging world and also prompted me to write the 'Am I A Bad Blogger' post which you can read here. It saddened me while making me laugh as the real impact of the online world suddenly hit me with brute force - our self worth and idealisms are based on people who write about foreign substances while daintily mentioning posh synonyms like they are going out of fashion. 

Please give me feedback on whether you like these types of posts as I love to share my life and my rather perplexing thoughts with you. 
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Fashion Changed My Life

October 09, 2014

Fashion as a whole is something that I believe has changed my life, where an illustrious industry has managed to manipulate my thoughts and experiences from the day I set my eyes on my local shopping centre, where I had the burning need to prove others wrong and show them that dreams can come true. Fashion to me is one of the most important elements of my short seventeen years and without it I don't believe that I would have turned out to be the person I am today.

I can pinpoint exactly when my heart started to beat faster and my mind became transfixed on the importance of dressing well and following trends, it was early 2007 and I was reading gossip magazine New! which my mum occasionally left lying round the house. I didn't know it at the time, but I'd reached the 'chic or freak' pages, famous for criticising eccentric models and high street horror stories, yet I was fascinated by the daringness of the famous figures and the happiness they achieved from dressing how they wanted to, even if in the magazines' eyes they looked downright ugly. It started to rule my head as the thought of school turned into the thought of a non uniform day where I could design and dream up brand spanking outfit ideas for pretty much all of my class, where the importance of a non uniform day became the highlight of the term. It also signified the ending of the academic year, which may have added to the excitement and sheen of it all yet my heart still believes that without having the freedom to express myself for one day a term I'd have gone stir crazy.

As I've grown up, I've taken the ability to mix and match outfits one step further, with the creation of my blog and the start of sixth form, where every day is a clean portrait ready to be painted on, where I should be ready to make my mark. Over the past year I've had fashion disasters, (read: midi dresses after Pizza Hut) fashion favourites and most importantly, I've felt free. I felt as though there were no constrictions in my being and that teamed with the right pair of boots and a good lipstick, I could take over the world. The saying always was "every day is a fashion show and the world is your runway," and the majority of the time this was the mode of life I stuck to.

Alas, life changes. I've recently started my final year of A Levels at a prehistoric school who have the guts and determination to stifle the loves and desires of its own pupils, thereby abandoning the creative needs that their pupils want and need in order to survive. They tightened the dress code.

Okay - yes, I'm exaggerating though the moment the headed slip of paper popped through our letter box enlightening both parent and student about the changes to the dress code, my whole ideology of sixth form fell apart. I no longer felt free and able to make my own choices. Coupled with other difficult factors at the time left me feeling as though some superior figure now held the keys to my own brain and it was one of the scariest emotions of my life. And although this incident left me reeling, it allowed me to understand how much one simple word has carried me through my life. And guess what it is - fashion.

Fashion is the epitome of my whole life and judging by recent situations, its impact will live with me for the rest of my life. Without one slight word beginning with F, I don't think my personality would have developed the way it has and I know for a fact that my confidence would have suffered dramatically. As Ken Barlow always says, "I am the only constant in your life" and for the most part, this is the only way I can describe one overwhelming semantic field full of materialism and laughter: fashion.

Disclaimer: This post was originally written for Loveable Vogue.
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Am I A Bad Blogger?

October 07, 2014

My Bloglovin dashboard has been littered with countless links on 'how to be a good blogger' and 'how to be successful in the blogging world' over the past few months. Supposedly, the world of bloggers insist that we should all be perfectly rich while publishing over the top glamour notes at every available opportunity. I accept that to be at the top of your game, you need to invest both time and money into your www dot yet I think that pure passion and writing talent should go further than the expense of a SLR and a rich momma.

But supposedly I am a bad blogger.

I do not post daily as I have an actual life outside of the interweb, and unlike the well known bloggers - Zoe London, Lily Melrose and The Sunday Girl - this is not a full time job for me. Hell, it isn't even a part time job, it's a hobby and it's something that I personally admire myself for doing as my over the top brain is the most uncommitted thing I have seen in a while, as shown by the four blogs in three years situation (oops.) Although I try to post three times every seven days, I feel guilty as I don't have the time nor deep feeling to want to push out countless pieces of good quality content as much as 14 times a week like the bigger bloggers.

I have no niche. I am not a magician with my words, I cannot conjure up deep images in my readers' heads, I cannot take beautiful pictures yet I cannot make a nondescript paragraph sound sophisticated either. Looking back on the past couple of months, the fight between reader and writer has stepped up massively as the reader demands individuality and honesty, but the amount of new writers who have emerged wanting an enormous readership has astounded me also. I realised that I'm just one in a million (literally) and unless I think of something pronto, I'm just going to be submerged over talented teenagers with a better style and a better life. Yay.

I have never understood the obsession of owning forty similar lip glosses nor do I have the funds to achieve this. And this is the key to being a beauty blogger right? Without owning every single bloody Naked palette, there's no point existing is there? If there's one thing that the beauty world has taught me, it's that you need high end products to be pretty. It says it all when I've just watched a famous Youtubers' video (no names mentioned of course) and my friend who's sat next to me asked me whether she actually owned anything from the high street. And no, it's not a drug store - we're not American!

I have never owned a DSLR, and in the near future I do not expect to own one. Yes, the picture quality is astounding once you learn how to use it, but it scares me that so many teenage girls can dangle a four hundred pound plus camera over their necks while still using the automatic function. I am a firm believer that it is the owner of the camera and not the device itself which creates the magic, but without a fancy tripod and an equally fancy Canon I obviously shouldn't be thinking about making Youtube videos and definitely shouldn't be photographing products or landscapes as the lighting would surely portray the view incorrectly - except if you use free daytime light or Picmonkey, of course.

I don't have the HTML skills to create a theme and template which is fully responsive and tailored to my every need. However much I would love to be fully qualified in designing and coding, my lack of free time is forcing my blog to look, well - basic.

Alas, I feel as though these things do not matter. Scrap that, these things do matter, but they cannot change my fate and they cannot change the fact that no matter what, I love to write and without this passion and determination forcing me to write, there would be no blog. There would be no outfit posts if I was not passionate about fashion (although I do admit these posts have been pretty thin on the ground at the moment) but what I'm trying to say rather badly is that why should my blog be dependent on outside factors and constraints set onto me by other people?

This post wasn't written for sympathy, I don't want comments telling me that I'm a 'good' blogger because I know I never will be yet I just wanted to let my feelings on the subject out and let you know why I never will be one of the popular girls as I wasn't born to be. And this will never change.

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Stop and Listen Out

October 05, 2014

I don't know about you, but there are some music tracks and songs out there which can captivate my heart in a minute and force me to just stop still and listen to them. I'm meant to be writing essays about onion skinning during animations but I've just had some of my favourite 'stop and listen' songs appear on my ITunes shuffle which I guess has lead me to Blogger to tell you all about them.
I like girl bands, I'm not going to lie. I love the happiness that radiates from every note, I love the sadness the ballads seem to possess, I love the jittering beats and the 'bass down low' as the tune of the same name says. I've grown up listening to bands such as Girls Aloud and The Saturdays, and even though my music change probably sounds like it should belong to a seven year old rather than a girl with seventeen years behind her, it describes me perfectly and the lyrics still race through my body impacting my synapses, just like they did when I was little, except now they mean so much more. The lyrics are filled with memories, laughter and tears, with the hidden meaning now being ever so prominent as I remember eight and nine year old Olivia being ever so perplexed about the big words but singing them anyway.
It doesn't matter whether the music I like is ten years old, brand new or aged fifty, because every song I own means something unexplainable to me and here's some of my favourites:
The Saturdays - Why Me, Why Now (Motown version) / My Heart Takes Over
Girls Aloud - Life Got Cold (I hated this until a couple of years ago)
Little Mix - Good Enough
Lana Del Rey - Cola
Avril Lavine - Alice
Marina Diamondis - Teen Idle / This Is LA
Robin Thicke - Get In My Way / Top of the World
Olly Murs - Heart On My Sleeve
Ordinary Boys - Life Will Be The Death of Me
I guess I'd love for you to listen to a few and tell me if you liked them etc etc, but at the same time I know every single person who exists has their own list of 'stop and listen out' songs and this, to me is one of the most beautiful things about the human race, we are so unique and every song holds individual meaning. Ciao for now!
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Liebster Award

October 02, 2014

-beautiful bikes that made me smile on sunday-

 Fuurin nominated me for the Liebster Award a couple of weeks ago while I was having a mind block but to be nominated again is mind blowingly fabulous and it scares me yet enthralls me in equal measures that faceless users are interested in what I have to say. As I'm sure you know the slightly over the top and mind numbing rules for this award by now, I'll jump straight in and answer anything you may want to know. If you have never read or seen a Liebster Award before, the rules can be found on Fuurin's blog right here.

What are you currently listening to?
My mind has decided that wailing vocals laid on a hotbed of deep beats is the cure to my happiness and therefore the last twenty songs played into my headphones were by Marina Diamondis, most commonly known as Marina and the Diamonds. 

Is there anywhere else you'd rather be right now?
I'm currently sat in a sweaty, tuna smell tinged sixth form library, so anywhere apart from here would be beautiful. A beach in Florida is the dream, yet the reality is probably a rainy town centre and a hot chocolate topped off with marshmallows and proper cream.

What has been your favourite blog post that you've written to date?
 I wouldn't like to say I had a favourite post, as so many have meant so much to me for different reasons as this blog is a place for me to journal my life and thoughts, and without this place on the net my head may have frazzled into smithereens and my hope for the future will have vanished into thin air like I wasn't worth existing anymore. I say this, yet I am very proud of this post here from my old blog and I feel as though it was the start of a chapter for me, and this here is the punch line.

Tell me what you're reading.
I barely read anymore, sigh. The only things I read continuously are blogs, which is a little sad in itself and depressing though I'm not ashamed about it. Bloggers create constant streams of new content which helps my brain tick over in this fast, commericalised world and my favourites include Scarphelia, LLYMLRS and Gingerly Pale

Reveal a facet of yourself that you have not mentioned on your blog.
 My favourite nail polish shade used to be Ameretto Crush and I'm currently wearing it and hating it now. (read: I only let you guys know things I'm comfortable with you knowing.)

Favourite visual?
 This poster from Keep It Bright which takes pride of place next to my bed. 

Close your eyes and think of a room. That room is yourself. How does it look?
This is deeper than the sea and I don't know whether my mind can fathom an answer. The only image that comes into my head is a building site converting an old, run down shack into an open plan space which will be sold on the London property market for millions. I guess this is deep too.  

What made you smile today?
 Insignificant rambles from my friends which were too insignificant to even remember Supposedly this is the beauty of life and surely without these insignificant moments your life would be incredibly boring as every second would include a drama.

A quote you live by.
 "Be a bad ass bitch from hell so nobody can fuck with you." 
Nicola Roberts actually commented on the Instagram photo which included this quote on my account, which gives it an added meaning and increases the strength of it in my brain I guess. 

The most recent thing that has changed you.
Realising that I can achieve and be whoever I want to be. So many people that I thought I knew personally do not matter at all anymore and should never have mattered in the first place. If this is the only life lesson I take from this year, I've made the right decision as I am not a pushover and realising this has opened my eyes to a new beginning. 

I nominate anybody who wishes to complete this tag.
 I always reply to blog comments and tweets.
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